Shoeshoe, Pretoria, South Africa
Family orientated, bubbly, hilarious, warm, with healthy self-esteem: “Don’t dim your light so others can shine!”
Glimpse of everyday life and thoughts of a stay at home mom in Pretoria, South Africa, which has been in one of the harshest lockdowns due to Covid-19.
Important, critical words, and example of actions, what needs to be done to improve girl’s and women’s position in Africa. At the same time love and appreciation for home country.
And a very important lesson learnt: “Never ever take your eyes off your passport while traveling!”
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Meet Shoeshoe, 40, originally from Johannesburg, South-Africa, living today in Pretoria, South-Africa.
She is married to Mikko and they have an 11-year-old daughter, Säde, and two pet tortoises, Frankie and Bonnie.
Shoeshoe is a stay at home mum and works as part-time travel & lifestyle concierge professional, helping busy individuals with everyday travel, events and lifestyle management.
And how Shoeshoe and Tiina met? Mikko and Tiina are childhood neighbours and as their parents still live next to each other, they meet at least during the summer holidays and Christmas!
Check Shoeshoe’s travel tips for South Africa: “Visit to South Africa wouldn’t be complete without a trip to Cape Winelands. And for the foodies, you won’t be disappointed by the Michelin-star-worthy fine dining experiences of the Cape such as Wolfgat, La Colombe, Chef’s Warehouse by Liam Tomlin and so many other superb dining experiences.
A big 5 safari is a must! And the Kruger National Park is safari heaven with so many options for accommodation to suit all kinds of budgets and tastes. And for those who don’t want to take malaria tablets, you won’t be disappointed by going on safari in Kwa-Zulu Natal to a place like Nambitihills.
South Africa is beautiful and has so much to offer! Take a leap of faith and come and visit this wonderful place I call home!”.
EVERYDAY LIFE
Shoeshoe’s morning start “with so much dread!”. She is not a morning person! In the morning she would very much prefer being left alone. When the alarm goes off, she needs 15 minutes to actually get up and start the day with a big cup of coffee.
South Africa is currently in one of the harshest lockdowns and there is a curfew. So, the days are, and have been, so monotonous. A typical Tuesday, or any day, is about the same: after waking up some kind of light workout and then to log in for online school that Säde has been doing for 5 months now.
Covid-19 lockdown in South Africa has been a real self-isolation and sometimes a lonely experience. But it’s also been such a peaceful time. Shoeshoe has been able to pour energy into the things that make her happy and really appreciate how good her life is. Like sitting on backyard patio from 2 to 4 to enjoy the warmth of the winter sun – that is the best part of the day.
Time spent with family always leaves her feeling good! Good in everyday life: being alive. “Having a loved one being diagnosed with a serious illness, can really turn your world upside down and make you question EVERYTHING. When times get tough, draw closer to your loved ones. My natural instinct is to run away, but I learnt to stay and confront the feelings, the experiences, listen more and say often sorry.”
When your primary role is that of a caregiver, e.g. a stay at home mum, every minute of your day is about doing something for someone else. For Shoeshoe the very best treat is giving herself time off to do something alone or with friends. Something just for her when she does not worry about anything or anyone. In everyday life taking care of herself means getting things done and she rewards herself by soaking in a hot bubble bath with a little red wine after a long day and week <3
In the front of the mirror she repeats: “Yasssss! I am strong, I am fearless, I am worthy, I am black, I am beautiful, I am enough!”.
DREAMS & FEARS, PAST & FUTURE
What are your dreams?
”With everything going on in the world right now, I dream of equality and acceptance. I don’t want to be tolerated or feared. I want this for all people of color.”
What is your worst fear?
“Time, not having enough of it.”
What is the most important advice you have received?
“There are two special advices: 1. Everything will always work out in your favor, even if it doesn’t go according to your plan 2. Don’t dim your light so others can shine.”
What has been the greatest global invention of your time?
“Wifi.”
Where would you donate your time/money to?
“It is a widespread but unknowledged problem that girls in Africa miss school and stay at home because of menstruation. According UNICEF, one in ten schoolgirls in Africa miss classes or drop out completely due to their period and substitute regular pads or tampons for less safe and less adsorbent materials such as rags, newspaper or bark. (www.projectdignity.org.za) Menstruation, in addition to lack of access to hygiene products, serves as a barrier to education to many girls. I support the DisChem Foundation Million Comforts by regularly donating sanitary pads.” (www.dischem.co.za/million-conforts)
Has the position of girls/women changed during your lifetime?
“I’m not sure it has, especially in South Africa where gender-based violence is at an all-time high. Women and girls are under attack. It’s pretty sad.”
If you could, what advice would you give to your 20-year-old self?
“Stay in school. Don’t be defined by others. Trust your gut feeling. Know your worth.”
Where will you be in 10 years?
“Traveling and curating experiences for like-minded woman.”
What would you say to a woman of your age who lives across the world?
“Live your life, take chances, be crazy. Don’t wait, because right now is the oldest you’ve ever been and the youngest you will ever be again.”
STORY
“When Mikko and I started dating, he used to travel between South Africa and France for work. One trip South, he decided to surprise me with a trip to Mauritius.
We arrived at the airport; flight was delayed 2 times. I did some duty-free shopping, which requires that you show your passport. Anyhow, we sat in the lounge enjoying one too many glasses of champagne and finally went to board our flight – many hours later than the original departure time. We landed in Mauritius and join the queue for immigration, only to find that I no longer had my passport on me: I had forgotten it at one of the duty-free shops in South Africa!
Major drama!! The airplane that was now heading back to South Africa from Mauritius was stopped on the tarmac and I was basically deported from Mauritius!!
A whole, entire mess. 48 later, with an emergency temporary travel document, we were on an airplane making our way back to Mauritius. During the trip I had no luggage, but anyway we made the most fun of it. But the lesson learnt: NEVER EVER take my eyes off my passport when traveling!”.
QUICK ONES
Drink: Salty Margarita from Taso’s Bar & Grill
Favorite food: Dombolo/Steam bread (South African version of dumplings). I love it, but don’t know how to make it properly.
Delicacy: Chakalaka and pap (South African vegetable relish)
Restaurant/Café: Central in Hazelwood
Spice: Robertsons make the best mixed spices in the world!
Music: Amapiano for good dance/party session, otherwise I really listen to all sorts of music depending on my mood.
Scent: Chanel
Travel destination: Cape Town (and Manchester, UK is my favorite place to live after South Africa)
Book: Until today by Iyanla Vanzant
Movie: Black is King by Beyoncé
Favorite public holiday: September 24, Heritage Day. South Africans celebrate their diverse culture.
Artist/band: Sade and Bruce Springsteen
Evening routine: Wash your make-up off, don’t forget the eye cream!
Favorite piece of clothing: Custom made wrap mini dress from Mustard Seed House – a super-fun, bold African print dress, which is so different from my black-on-black basis
Scenery: African bush
Sport: Hiking and running